Confusion Reigns Supreme

Just a couple of shots of where I am at the moment!

Lovely little family-friendly pub. If you can find it I'll be sitting in the corner blogging!

Click on the first image for details!

I know, shameless advertising, but we need all the custom we can get since the smoking ban!

I slog my guts out getting that report done by five (completed 16:50), go to deliver it and...

.

They've all gone home!

There's no-one around, they never even checked back to see how it was coming along.

Bastards.

That's it I'm going home.

I last blogged on Sunday night.

I don't believe it.

Not a word say by me about me, yesterday. (It is Tuesday, right? I'm not going mad, am I?)

Blimey! Maybe I'm not such an egotistical bastard after all - whatever egotistical means. I think it's something to do with the way I fill out my trousers!

OK, I did comment on a few other people's blogs, but I totally forgot about mine. How bloody stupid is that, eh?

Anyway, payday today, so I'll be down the pub a bit earlier than I have been for the last week socialising with you lot out there. I would keep going with this post, but unfortunately I've just got 40 reports to bind by 5 o'clock. Bugger.

How does he make it look so bloody easy?

1. I just wandered (a few hours ago) down to my local for a bit of blogging and comic catch-up as usual only for my precious lappy to end up in the middle of the road. The shoulder-strap on my case has expired, it has ceased to be. It has shuffled off this mortal coil. If it weren't still attached to my bag it would be pushin' up daisies. It is an ex strap.

2. I have lost the cable to connect my camera to my computer.

3. So has my mum with hers.

4. I don't get paid until Tuesday.

5. I have £9.23 to last until then.

Sometimes life just seems shit.

Then I realise that

1. It's easier to carry the damned thing by hand than by shoulder.

2. All I need to do is buy a memory card and I can slot it straight out of the camera into the lappy.

3. erm...

4. I get paid on Tuesday!

5. I still have enough in my pocket to scrape by.

and 6. I'm alive and healthy.

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing life's gristle,
Don't grumble,
Give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistle]

If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle.
That's the thing.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the right side of life,
[whistle]

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.
Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...

Always look on the bright side of death,
[whistle]
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
[whistle]

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke it's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life.
[whistle]

Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]

Repeat to fade...

I want to set up another blog to separate the frivolous things from the more serious bits, as some of my serious posts have been taken frivolously and some of my frivolous posts have been taken seriously.

I can't do that until I go pro. Bugger.

That means spending money.

Mind you it also means I'd have more control over what goes where and how my blogs look.

OK, Next month I'm gonna go pro. Financial constraints prevent me from doing that right now. Ho-Hum.

Got to sign off now, they've called time and they're turning the lights off and shouting at me. Blog ya later!

Feeling a little peckish this morning I thought I'd try a SpecialK cereal bar.

I opened the packaging to find that it looks like someone in the Kellogg's factory is really keen on his work:

Yes, it's the yoghurt flavoured topping.

Still made me think twice, though!

And I'm one of them

Your Bumper Sticker Should Be

Jesus is coming - everybody look busy

I really must get on and do something useful...

Mum's been fretting for the last couple of days about meeting up with an old schoolfriend for lunch today.

"What if her kids are more successful than mine?"

"What if the man I introduced her to all those years ago turned out to be wrong for her?"

"What if she's more successful than me?"

"What if..."

With trepidation she went to meet up with her friend not knowing what to expect - they'd got back in touch through Fiends Reunited (deliberate typo). Would she turn up looking down her nose at her? Would she arrive in a brand new Merc? Would she like the venue (our local)?

Her friend turned up driving an 'S' Reg Fiesta, still married after 45 years to the lad my mum introduced her to, and she likes a drink and a smoke or four!

Mum's happy now!

But what a palaver she put herself through. Jeez, anybody would have thought she was meeting the Queen!

Just goes to show that you should never worry about the "What ifs" in your life.

One of my colleagues had a birthday today and they brought in some doughnuts (as you do) to share around at Coffee this morning.

I don't do coffee, I'm normally too busy with whatever they've dumped on me on their way round to the "Project Room" (Otherwise known as the kitchen.)

Usually someone comes round afterwards with the remaining doughnuts/cakes/whatever and offers them to those who couldn't be at Coffee for whatever reason.

On my way out to lunch, the boss caught up with me to tell me that there were a couple of doughnuts left if I wanted one. I thought, yeah, I'll grab one on my way back.

TOO LATE!

It was a beautiful morning again, this morning. Just a few lonely clouds scudding across the sky. But now it's overcast and looking ominously like we'll be getting more rain and I left my brolly and galloshes at home.

Blame it on the little one. It's his fault, splashing around in the Pacific like that, disturbing the chaos butterflies in South America. Grrrrr!!

Gods I hate it when that happens. This morning, on the way to work, I followed someone driving a Focus along a de-restricted road at 20 mph. There was absolutely no traffic ahead of them, but one hell of a lot behind.

Eventually we got to a point where I could overtake, when suddenly they decide to take up both, yes both sides of the road. After seeing that I decided to hang back a bit as obviously the car in front was being driven by someone who was still ped from last night!

Some people shouldn't be allowed to own a pushbike, let alone a frickin' car.

Got up, broad daylight and bright sunshine streaming through my nicotine-stained windows. Doesn't look like it'll rain today *fingers crossed*.

Got to work and parked up next to J's car in the main car-park. Uh-oh, she only parks there if she can't park in Solomon's designated parking space. Shit, that means he'll be in today. .

Got into the office and set myself ready for the day.

Checklist.

1. Coffee machine on. *check*
2. Copier on. *check*
3. Graphics standalone on. *check*
4. Intranet terminal on. *check*
5. Window open. *check*
6. Fan on. *check*
7. Plotter on. *check*
8. Intranet printer on. *check*
9. Standalones 1&2 on. *check* & *check*

Right, I'm now ready for anything the world can throw at me.

Sudden thought, check the calandar, see what time Solomon is due in -

He's on leave in Estonia for two whole fricking weeks!

Life just couldn't be much better than this...

Just popped out to the village for some ciggies and thought "Heck, they'll all be snoozing after that grand Sunday Roast, I may as well grab my lappy and head off to the pub for a swift half" So here I am.

My self-imposed exile from blogland lasted all of 48 hours!

It gave me a chance to catch up on a few less important things, like housework and my beloved PlayStation.

I even got round to opening my latest purchase for said PS2 - Final Fantasy XII.

Here's my initial review of it:-

Seems quite good.

Nah, seriously here it is -

Graphics - Stunning, as is now to be expected from the game now it has moved on from the PSX days. Human characters are believable, long-gone are the Manga-style characters of FFVII and the backgrounds, buildings and vehicles are extremely well rendered.

Story-line - Long and convoluted, as is expected from the FF series, looking forward to many an hour trying to figure out just exactly where I got to before saving the game, let alone what's going on.

Battle sequences - Much better now that they are actually based in the area that you are in, rather than being transported off to fight on some standardised environment. The attacks do take some time to get used to, but once you do, it should become second nature (I hope - I haven't played it that much yet!)

All in all, even after only having played for a couple of hours, it seems far better than any of it's predecessors.

9/10

Internet connection's been going screwy today.

Found out why - most of the routers on this side of the building are crap, and the ones on the other side have been unplugged because the roof leaks!

Damned British weather.

I might not be around for the weekend - I might not be able to get to the pub (too much month left at the end of the money) but I should be back on Monday, though I may be able to wangle a little day out for myself somehow!

There are crumbs in your bed cos lets face it you don't live in a show home. What kind of cookies do those crumbs come from?

Chocolate Digestives. Mmm crumbly! (or should that be ouch, crumbly?)

2. You are sitting on the toilet brushing your teeth cos you are hung over as normal. What got you that drunk?

Cider

3. You have been dumped cos well, lets face it .. you are a loser. What comfort food do you grab? (after sticking pins in a voodoo doll obviously)

I don't get dumped - I'm even more of a loser!

4. Your wife/husband has pissed you off (that means angry in the US by the way ... not watersports) so you decide to go have an expensive gourmet meal on his/her credit card. What do you order?

Lobster Thermidor, just to see if I like it.

5. Sitting in church (waiting for the lightning to strike you) and you have a book/magazine tucked inside the hymn sheet. What is it?

Razzle New Scientist

I tag:-

jaketaylor
just_carina
roisini
hobbsy

My mobile disappeared for a while last night, but was "found" by a "friend" of mine. Grateful for its return I bought him a pint (as you do.)

This afternoon I get a message on my phone -

"Freemsg: Im Cindy! Want to meet me somewhere private for a b? C my FREE Pix Text CINDY to: XXXX"

I am now convinced that my "friend" has signed my phone on to a bloody porn site, coz it's not something that I'd do.

(Not after last time!)

Apparently this is quite nice...

You Are Mud Pie

You're the perfect combo of flavor and depth Those who like you give into their impulses

I hope so.

Just spent a few minutes out on the patio with a glass of cider (as you do) listening to the second most beautiful sound courtesy of good old Mother Nature. The birds have gone to roost and are singing their evening serenade! It's gorgeous around here now that the cat population seems to have dwindled. Songthrushes, titmice, robins, wrens, various finches all joining in an avian orchestra to produce the most wondrously diverse composition.

Don't ya just love it?

My local common preservation society seem to have a thing about dog-walkers. My dogs get walked on the common, it's good for their health both physically and mentally. They have a LOT of friends there and they thouroughly enjoy it. - PADDINGTON, GET OFF OF BENSON, HE'S NOT A SHE! - Yet some members of the committee object to the fact that dogs tend to defecate in the bushes, on the paths and in the carparks. I can understand the last two, and anyone who doesn't clean up after their dog if they do that is an irresponsible , but in the bushes?

I can understand to a certain extent the reasoning behind this - doggy poo not being natural to that part of the common - yet they bend over backwards to accommodate horse-riders, whose charges' discharges are left untended in the middle of the paths. How is that less damaging to the heath? How is that less damaging to my, or my dogs' health?

They also have a major downer about dogs on the common because they disturb the ground-nesting birds, particularly the endangered warblers that have been making a comeback to this part of the country. But so do the deer that also seem to be making a major comeback around here, yet because we, as responsible dog-owners, are capable of controlling our beasts, we are castigated because in one of the few areas around here where we can safely let our dogs do what dogs want to do without fear of them running out onto major, or even minor roads the custodians (all volunteers, by the way, and not government funded) seem to be hell bent on following the Government in their nanny-knows-best attitude.

There.

I've had my ranty session for today.

Silliness may follow soon!

Yes, I've just produced another one. I hope it gets as good a reception as the last one did.

I can't believe that people like this, but then that's my insecure self talking to me. The one that says "Nothing you ever do will be good enough for anything but the scrapheap"

But hey, I'm proud of the clouds in it so nyer!

IDMAT #20

...for a cig, socialised a bit and then came back in. I'm sorry to say that yet again the pub smells of fish, farts and BO with an added hint of very weak air freshener.

No wonder people are staying away in droves.

Yes, the time has come for me to put my foot down with a firm hand.

From this moment onwards anybody who calls me Bob WILL be deleted from my friends list.

The reason? Simple. Look at my username and the title of this blog. I am NOT BOB.
I never have been Bob and I never will be. Especially after watching one particular episode of Blackadder. You know the one I mean.

Just the thought of Rowan Atkinson's lips even just mouthing the word "Bob" makes my skin crawl.

You have been warned.

*sits back expecting far too many people to call me BOB*

I think the warnings should apply to me rather than the lighter!

Especially the flammable gas bit! *Prrp* (excuse me!)

I've just been out for a ciggie and during the course of the conversation with my fellow smokers one of them just happened to mention that since the smoking ban he's smoked more than usual. Why?

Because he doesn't want to be on his own in the pub when his mates are all outside smoking.